A Cold Paradise’s self-titled debut album is an enigma. A bit like the parable of the blind men and the elephant, where each one touched a different part of the animal and drew different conclusions about what it might look like. But before we proceed, let me warn you that a bit of “gatekeeping” is required to properly assess the album most honestly. But when it comes to Metal, its core message was gatekeeping: Metal rules; all other music sucks. This concept was the inspiration behind many of Judas Priest’s anthems; what faith did you think they were defenders of? It was also advertised in the early days of Twisted Sister as the band sold “Death to Disco” shirts.